Alert MockDocker Aniko sent me this photo the other day - it’s a Hungarian woman named Erzsebet Speter, who apparently was quite eccentric and gave pretty much all of her money to charitable causes. Aniko said the photo of the Simpson girls I posted recently reminded her of this lady.
I can see it, but here’s what I see even more:
An anonymous alert MockDocker brought this to our attention.
You know that family in Arkansas who has 17 kids? Well, that crazy mom is at it again, pregnant with number 18 and preparing for a New Year’s Day arrival in 2009.
This woman has been pregant for ELEVEN YEARS if you add up all the gestational activity. That is totally ridiculous.
All of the kids have names that start with J. The more fortunate ones are called names like Jackson and Jennifer and Jason and James - while those kids who are destined to hate their parents are called Jedidiah and Jinger.
Can you even imagine how easy it is for this woman to give birth at this point? They probably just fall out during the normal course of a day anymore. Like, she probably has had these last couple while braiding her hair or darning socks.
And Jennifer Aniston is FREEZING.
This is Jamie Lynn Spears looking like a picture of 16 year old pregnant innocence as she makes her way to her 2nd baby shower.
Looks like that visit with her big sis had an effect on her.
According to this, Paula Abdul fought and fought and fought to get David Hernandez and that horrible Danny Noriega into the top 24 on American Idol because they were needed due to them “being very open about being gay.”
This totally pisses me off. This is like a total gay version of affirmative action. Why push for two dudes who weren’t the most talented to get on a show that’s supposedly about talent?
Paula apparently became really emotional when talking about all of this because in her “real” life, most of her friends are gay. ”My whole life,” she said as she started to cry. “…has been surrounded by marvelous, wonderful gay people.”
I don’t doubt that’s true. I’m sure she’s a total gay magnet. But this whole idea of putting two jokers on the show simply BECAUSE they’re gay is really annoying.
Sarah Jessica Parker might, as Peter Griffin indicated, look like a foot, but she’s raising her son up right. She said recently:
“I think that if I had been raised a child of privilege, I wouldn’t be the working person I am today. I think it’s incumbent on my husband and me to really stress and to show James Wilkie by example what it means to owe your community something and that he is not entitled to the benefits of our hard work.”
I take issue with the fact that his middle name is Wilkie, but other than that, this is totally awesome.
I probably should just not watch TV ever. Because once again, I have fallen for a very persuasive commercial, about a product which I can practically guarantee won’t work, but because of the sheer possibility that it MIGHT, I am now $32.00 poorer than I was just moments ago.
I have just purchased the SONIC SCRUBBER, which is a product that looks like an electric toothbrush but which is really an implement designed to clean impossible places like the corners of tile showers, and the gooey crap that builds up around your faucets, and, according to the commercial, COUNTLESS OTHER PLACES.
The ordering process was very sneaky, because you click that you want the $19.99 SONIC SCRUBBER, and then you get all of these follow up screens which say, “BUT LOOK! For just $10 more you can have this and this and this and this!” And it’s only because my husband is sitting right next to me that I didn’t end up spending over $100 on all sorts of retarded products. Anyway, I spent the $19.99 on the SONIC SCRUBBER, another few bucks on tax, and then the balance of the $32 on shipping. But I COULD have spend just $12.00 more for RUSH shipping which would have guaranteed delivery in 7 days, or I could have OVERNIGHTED it for many more dollars.
Which begs the question, how dirty is your house if you need to OVERNIGHT such a product?
Anyway, since I didn’t spend any extra money on fancy fast shipping, it will probably take at least 8 weeks to get here. I almost hope it does so that I can call their customer service line and speak to a new Life Hating Person.
Once this genius product arrives, I will take before and after photos of all the nasty places in my house that need super sonic cleaning, and once again, you’ll have the benefit of my experience before purchasing one of these things yourself.
You’re welcome! 
So listen. I have a completely precious 2 and a half year old who I affectionately call, “Monkey”. And he’s like, a total genius. And I’m not even making that up just because I’m his mom. He can read and spell upwards of 100 words, and he’s generally perfectly behaved. This is a kid whose cry I don’t think I would even recognize because I rarely hear him complain about anything. This is a kid who minds us like 98% of the time. This is a kid who ASKS to go to bed each night, and then falls asleep the moment his perfect little head hits the pillow. I’m serious!
So here’s what happened last week. My husband picks him up from his sitter’s house, and is told that while he and his three little daycare buddies were sitting at their kid-sized lunch table, happily munching on chicken fingers and fries, our little monkey picked up a french fry in one hand. With the other hand, he reached into the back of his diaper, grabbed out a big chunk of poo, takes a big whiff of it, says, “Eeew. That’s yucky,” and proceeds to wipe his hand all over the front of his shirt, while gleefully eating the french fry.
If that’s not gross enough, today he decided that at nap time, he would just strip down, take his own (full) diaper off, grab some more poo, and smear it all over his babysitter’s son’s soccerball.
Thankfully, the babysitter thinks this is all kind of hilarious. But as parents, we’re kind of freaking out. We’re already having a totally hellacious time trying to get him potty trained, so the fact that he’s not only NOT potty trained but also using his own fecal matter as fingerpaint is kind of a problem.
Any and all advice would be greatly appreciated.
So in addition to getting kajillion dollar wedding rings for each other, Mariah Carey and her new husband Nick Cannon got his and her tattoos. Which they are happily displaying in this photo. It was sort of a given that she’d get some stupid butterfly tattoo, and she added the Mrs. Cannon, sort of in an understated way, right down the center of the butterfly spine. Typical trampstamp, for sure, but not completely obnoxious.
Now look at his. What the hell?!??! The only thing I can say is that dude seems to be quite committed to her.
Ashlee and Jessica Simpson are RIDICULOUS in this photo. Like, Olsen Twins ridiculous. And Jessica kind of looks like she’s about to stick out a big long lizard tongue. Seriously, they’re both verging on reptilian here.
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