The Mock Dock

This past Saturday, August 18th, I had the opportunity to participate in a motorcycle rally, called the Loop for Life, in the wonderful metropolis that is Indianapolis, Indiana.  The Loop for Life is a ride of approximately 5000-6000 riders who pay to ride, alone (all traffic blocked off by the fine officers of the Metropolitan Police Dept.) on the I-465 loop that encircles the entire city of 1.2 million  people.  I understand the glory… the open road, the wind in your facial hair…  So, needless to say it was my honor to participate…. in my 2002 Jeep Grand Cherokee!!!

As I entered I-465 from the 10th Street exit, it occurred to me that the highway was eerily devoid of 4-wheeled driving machines, like the one I was deftly manipulating down the ramp.  As I peered into my rearview mirror, I realized that I, in my typical state of inattentiveness and general confusion, had driven right past the police blockade as I tarried down the on-ramp. 

It was only as the thousands of motorcycles roared past me, each rider and passenger alike, staring in to my slightly tinted windows slinging leering visages of pure hatred that I realized, I had joined the rally to raise money to stem the spread and development of Spastic parapalegia.

Upon this realization, I did what all right, normal people would do… I laughed, called my brother to tell him how much these motorcycle and health enthusiasts hated me in that very moment.  Unable to communicate through my fits of uproarious laughter, I exited I-465 and trundled toward home on the slow, pot-hole infested surface streets.

All in all, it was a good day.  I hope my participation in the Loop for Life was the key to finding the cure for Spastic parapalegia (actually I don’t want them to cure it…it is too much fun to say).  And next year, I will ride again… and they will hate me more!

Absurdly yours,

Holmes