The 2nd season of Rock of Love with Bret Michaels starts next month, and I’m expecting to be completely addicted to this skankalicious extravaganza. This appears to be a promo photo, in which Bret’s cash and prizes appear to have possibly been “enhanced”. Seriously - that is ridiculous. There’s like a small watermelon trapped in his pants.
When asked what she thought about Jamie Lynn Spears’ pregnancy, Lindsay Lohan said, “Not much. Why do people think it’s such a big deal?”
See, she’s downplaying it because she’s trying to come up with the next thing that will put the focus back on HER. Be on the lookout for a hard night of partying and a hook-up with someone shocking, like JLS’s boyfriend or something. Followed by re-entry into rehab, and possibly a Vegas wedding.
I just found this and laughed out loud in the middle of the cubicle-filled land where I dwell. It might be faked, but I would like to believe it is real. If you think the writers at Mock Dock can be harsh, my God, this guy tops us all. Actually, I would have a hard time not laughing as well. So, watch this…have faith that it is real, and enjoy. Happy Holidays.
My husband has insisted that I cover in more detail the news that everyone is talking about. Namely, the Pregnancy of Jamie Lynn Spears. You know what I find hilarious about it? The following:
1. That when interviewed about her pregnantaciousness, she said, “I’m not showing, but some days I’m like: ‘Wow, I feel like I’m showing today,’ and Mom says: ‘No you’re not. Be quiet.’ It’s great to have her there. She is really supportive of me.” Am I the only one who finds it odd that JLS uses that particular quote of her mom’s to demonstrate how great it is to have her around and how supportive she is?
2. When asked if she thought she’d be a good mom, JLS said, “I love babies. I have a great mom and she has raised three kids, so if I take lessons from her, I think I’ll be great.” Is she serious? If she takes lessons from her mom, she’ll wind up with a pregnant teenager and a whoriffic skank of a daughter who flashes her cha-cha at every possible opportunity and thinks it’s more important to inject her lips with collagen than it is to brush her own toddler’s teeth.
3. When Lynne Spears was asked about her reaction to the news of the pregnalaciousness, she said, “I didn’t believe it because Jamie Lynn’s always been so conscientious. She’s never late for her curfew.” Yes, Lynne. Because statistics show that curfews and teen pregnancy statistics go hand in hand.
4. Nickolodeon is apparently rushing to put out some sort of show about teen pregnancy so that they can prevent JLS’s young fans from running out to copycat their idol. I can only hope they cast Britney in it.
5. All kinds of relevant and important celebrities are rushing to whatever paparazzo is within earshot to say what they think about the pregnaticity. Case in point, Lisa Whelchel, star of FACTS OF LIFE, had this to say, “I believe she’s being a good role model — a good role model in that situation, to choose to have the baby, and … I am supportive of her in that situation.” Did anyone else even remember that Lisa Whelchel existed? Is she now the go-to person for commentary on this sort of thing?
6. There are ALREADY reports that JLS and whoever the baby daddy is are no longer together. Which is shocking given the high success rate of relationships that started at the age of 13.
Stay tuned for more details on this ever developing story. Oh yeah, and here’s your Brit pic of the day.
According to reports, Tyra Banks blames the tabloids and paparazzi for her inability to find a good man, because they keep everyone thinking she’s hooked up with various people when she’s really not.
Mmm hmm. THAT is the reason you’re single, Tyra.
The sinewy and feminine daughter of Cher, Chastity Bono, was seen out and about and seemingly trying to direct traffic the other day. Cher, beautifully aging and not at all surgically enhanced, remained oblivious to her daughter’s efforts.
I know the big news is that her sister’s pregnant, but this picture was too priceless not to post. Besides, Jamie Lynn has been, up to now, let’s face it - kinda boring. Once she flashes her hoo-ha a few times and starts dressing more like her big sis, we’ll give her some face time. Until then, all future references made to her pregnancy will include a photo of Britney looking, hopefully, as ridiculous as this.
…I think her owner would put her to sleep for looking like this. She couldn’t look more rabid if she were foaming at the mouth.
Yep - it’s American Idol Season # Whatever winner, Fantasia Barrino, displaying her statuesque form to the world. Rumors abound that she is with child. Which isn’t nearly as interesting as Jamie Lynn being with child, but came with a much more hilarious photo. Consider yourself informed.
Nothing to report really - except that Britney is wearing a shirt which covers parts of her body that are normally hideously exposed. For this, I would like to thank her, and offer her encouragement to experiment with a burka.
Oh yeah - and Britney’s 16 year old sister is pregnant. So, clearly good sense prevails in this family. Perhaps when Britney finallyloses her kids she can just take Jamie Lynn’s - she’ll be too drunk or high to notice the difference anyway.
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