The Mock Dock

The wait is over, Mockdockers.  The sleepless nights, the wondering, the agonizing over whether or not the Kinoki Foot Pads would ever reach me - it’s finally come to an end. 

THEY HAVE ARRIVED.

I will test one out tonight, but wanted to provide you with a true play-by-play update.  The kind you’ve come to expect from me.  And that means you need to know everything about these foot pads.  For instance, you need to know that it cost SIXTEEN DOLLARS to ship them.  They were shipped regular mail, and it took approximately eight weeks to get here.   So I think it’s safe to assume that Mr. Kinoki-san is sitting in some palace somewhere mocking me for buying into this crap.

Anyway, my first impression, after removing one pad from its sterile protective envelope (pictured above) is that they REEK.  And, you can see that there is like a smaller square of stuff sort of within the big square.  To ensure that I was providing you all with the most in-depth reporting possible, I tore a little hole into that square of stuff to check it out.  And it’s basically dirt.  Like the kind of dirt that you empty out of your vacuum cleaner.  Only stinkier.

The amount of faith I have that applying vacuum dirt to the bottom of my foot will make me feel like a superhero is approximately equal to the amount of faith I have that Ashley Judd will cease to be mentioned by Nascar.  Minus pi.

So basically very little faith.

Nevertheless, I made a promise to my 17 faithful readers that we would follow through with this first ever MockDock experiment, and I intend to do just that.  Check back tomorrow, when you’ll see photographic evidence of what the foot pad looks like after I peel it off. 

Let the good times roll.