So, there is again/still speculation that Britney is pregnant with creepy Adnan’s kid. Which would, I have to admit, bring me an enormous amount of delight. Not that I wouldn’t feel bad for the kid, who would have absolutely no prayer to be anything other than a total lunatic, but it would make for some good mocking.
Besides, Britney has gotten pretty boring since her parental unit finally decided to actually PARENT her.
So apparently there is a story from reputable and reliable newsource The National Enquirer, which says that Hulk Hogan had an affair with one of his daughter’s galpals, shortly before Linda filed for divorce.
Now before you get too grossed out, the affair girl is a good 10 years older than Hulk’s daughter. But before you decide not to get too grossed out, let me remind you that she SLEPT WITH HULK HOGAN.
When Perez is right, he’s right! Creepy, terrible Danny from AI totally looks like Jessica Alba. I think he has a bright future as her drag-queen counterpart. Mostly because he most certainly should be voted off this week.
“Here’s the teeth-clenchingly annoying 29 year old, Katherine Heigl, looking like the 45 year old chain smoker she is. She smokes American Spirit, the only 100% organic tobacco cigarette, because I guess she thinks that inhaling natural smoke is better than other smoke. Here’s a hint: It’s smoke. I’m sure when the fireman tells you to crawl on your stomach it isn’t because of the additives.”
You guys. You know how Janet Jackson is coming out with a new album? I just read that she has a lyric, and I’m not making this up, which is as follows:
“I’m heavy like a first-day period”
Seriously, how hard up are you for a lyric when THAT is the best you can come up with? Was there NOTHING else heavy she could use?
Ok, week two people. Mockarena is getting her nails done while she gets her teeth brightened. Hopefully her nails will be red and teeth white, and not the other way around. Anywhoo, she has put me in charge of the official Idol Live Blog. I can’t tell you how nervous I am. Here goes nothin.
I know I’ve posted about them before. But you guys, seriously. How mismatched are they? And it’s like it just gets worse. It’s as if he sees my posts about how mismatched they are, and his response is to look MORE horrible the next time around. “I’ll show that Mockarena” he says. “She thinks I’m hideous now? Well, just wait.” And at the same time Brittany Murphy becomes hotter.
Some poor defenseless animal was killed to be worn around his neck, ostensibly to ENHANCE his appearance. I defy you to show me a better example of animal cruelty.
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