Someone Please Explain Her Appeal

I do NOT get what people find attractive about Jessica Biel.  I think she is absolutely completely thoroughly ordinary.  And I know what you’re thinking.  You’re thinking, “Well, this just happens to be Jessica after a workout. It’s not fair to base a judgment on that.  Her bangs are all sweaty and matted and greasy and everything.  You know, from her workout.”

But here’s the thing. This was taken at the ESPY awards.  You know - where most people DRESS UP, including her boyfriend who was HOSTING the whole thing.  This was how she looked DRESSED UP and PRESUMABLY CLEAN.

If you are a boy, and you find Jessica Biel attractive, please come forward and explain yourself at once.

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9 Responses to “Someone Please Explain Her Appeal”


  1. 1 Crabby

    Maybe she and her boyfriend knocked boots in the limo like Angelina and Billybob, and the scarf hides the hickeys? I dunno.

  2. 2 BiscuitTin

    I never got it, either. And she was voted People’s sexiest woman alive one year, I think? And I was like, Really? The chick from 7th Heaven? Or Party of 5 or 8 is Enough - whatever number show she was on. I’m not seeing it.

  3. 3 wordwych

    Are those her panties around her neck?

  4. 4 jordan

    She has a great booty though

  5. 5 anon

    She’s isn’t any more feminine than Brooke Hogan in my opinion.

  6. 6 ER

    She’s definitely got a lot of manly qualities, but she’s not nearly as masculine as Scarlett JoMANson. Now that is one unattractive chick that men seem to drool over!

  7. 7 Pris

    Well, I don’t think is really the face that the guys drool over when it comes to Scarlett….

  8. 8 Dr. Feelbad

    Butterface. She looks like a burn victim.

  9. 9 Regular Guy

    The appeal lies in her body….her bum is possibly the best on the planet.

    Just my observation.

    She reminds me of Cameron Diaz…coincidentally another ex of JT….all body with a butter face…you know

    Her body is great, butter face is not so much.

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