The Mock Dock

First things first.  Today, I forgot to wear earrings.  I could NOT STOP touching my earlobes all day - they felt so naked.  I hate that.

So, a couple days ago, Dame, Holmes and I were at lunch, like we almost always are, and the topic of Holmes’ horrid beast of an ex-wife came up.  And he was telling a story about her most recent beastiness, as I sat there, incredulous.  I believe I said something to the effect of “Why would she do that?” to which Dame replied, equally incredulous, “Are you new?”  And the way she said it was so positively hilarious and right on, because everything that the ex-beast does is horrible, and so it IS silly for me to be consistently incredulous about her.  It’s just a given that ex-beast will never do anything that ISN’T horrible.

At this very same luncheon, at which we ate our meal outside, we watched a bunch of loud obnoxious birds fighting with each other, cheepin’ smack.  But that’s a story for another day.

You’re probably wondering what this all has to do with Heather Mills.

Well, today, Heather Mills’ publicist of 4 years, quit.  And do you know why?  Because Heather Mills is, according to said publicist, “an impossible person.”  And when I read that, I immediately thought, “Hey publicist person.  Are you new?”  How oblivious of a person do you have to be to JUST NOW BE FIGURING OUT that Heather Mills is impossible?

Anyway, my point is that some things are just really obvious, and that you shouldn’t forget to wear earrings.