An alert and astute mockdocker sent us a link to some photos of a DUDE putting on a pair of pantyhose. Only they aren’t even regular pantyhose - they are MANTYhose, because they have the front fly thingy that boy underwear has. Someone has actually created a pantyhose product for men.
Anyway, you can imagine my intrigue. The pictures then linked back to this other website which is a blog seemingly DEVOTED to pantyhose-wearing dudes. The intro actually reads as follows:
Men, as well as women,
wear nylon legwear (tights and pantyhose)
for a number of reasons.
Fashion, warmth, comfort, athletic performance, healthy legs
or just because they feel good to wear.
I’m going to need some help from our male readers on this one. How, I ask you, might mantyhose assist with athletic performance? I mean, all the other reasons listed are ridiculous too, but that one really stood out.
And feel good to wear? What the hell? One of the primary reasons I have the job I do is so that I don’t have to wear pantyhose. I’ve actually managed to go at least the past whole decade without having to wear a single pair, and I consider that an actual job benefit.
Anyway, the site is hilarious. There are personal accounts of men who wear hose and how their girlfriends help them pick out hose, etc. You have to see it to believe it.
“Feel good to wear”? GOOD?!!!!
I gotta buy me a MANTYhose because if they’re actually comfy then I’ve been buying the wrong kind (and suffering with it) all my life!!!
Regarding the sports thing… a friend of mine used to shave his legs so he could swim faster, so maybe is the same with the MANTYhose? (????!!!)
Maybe Holmes should get a pair and test them out for us…be sure to post pictures. I don’t see how anyone would enjoy wearing panty or mantyhose. I hate them with a passion.
Mockarena, I too consider it a job benifit to not have to torture myself with those horrible things. I have always thought that whoever created those dumb thing for women to wear was evil. Maybe because they don’t have to slide them down each time they have to use the restroom and then spend 10 minutes fixing them so the crotch isn’t at your knees, they are semi manageable, but I still can’t imagine they feel good.
I have no idea why any person, male, female, or otherwise, would WANT to wear hose. I did drag queens’ makeup for a brief stint in teenagerhood, and the “gals” would wear two or three pairs (of women’s cut) to cover up leg hair, as well as help to hide “something.” I could not understand why not just shave.
I’ve heard of men wearing pantyhose to reduce chafing if they’re going to be riding horses for a long period of time (I’m talking about actors here, not professional riders who are accustomed to spending hours in the saddle) but I’ve never heard of ANYONE male or female who felt that pantyhose feel good to wear!! IMO, they are proof that evil is not just a concept, but sometimes an actual manifestation! I’m currently job-searching, and one of my deepest fears is that I will have to take a job where I will have to wear these stupid things on a regular basis.
BTW, I second what sbarros said!! Holmes really needs to do this.
Just polled my husband, a former collegiate wrestler, on the benefits of tights or pantyhose to athletic performance. He simply said, “They don’t help.”
I’ve thought of 2 possible (”possible” being underlined a dozen times!) athletic uses for those horrible things - gymnastics, or dancing. Mockarena, I totally agree with you about wearing pantyhose. I luckily have a job where I don’t have to wear the wretched, unholy things, and I go barelegged under skirts as long as I can get away with it. I would’ve liked to see the video of the guy actually putting them on - fighting to pull them up, sitting on the bed, praying to not put a runner in them so you don’t have to do it all over again!
Joe Namath pitched Manny Hose in a tv and magazine ad 30 odd years ago. Most of you may be too young to remember old Joe but he was considered the sexiest man in America in the 60’s and 70’s.
Track stars and swimmers wear full length tights these days when they compete. Can’t be too different from panty hose.
I also forgot to add that I am SO much MORE attracted to this guy with his mantyhose on, so much so that I could RIP them OFF him
Oh if only that were the case, ahhahahahahah
What I love about pantyhose is that regardless of the shade I put on, they are never even remotely close to my actual skin color. I did mention the MANtyhose at work today and one dude says for Ruck Sack marches, he’ll cut off the legs and just wear the thigh and up, due to chafing.
I remember those Joe Namath ads…and they were definitely not aimed at getting men to put on pantyhose. But I loooove that now, in addition to the armpit lickers, The MockDock will now have legions of Mantyhose fans as well.
I just saw a guy wearing them at a BP station in East St Louis the other day. Of course they were on his head over his face.
Didn’t those guys from period pieces / old movies use hoses, like, those where the ladies had them dresses with HUGE butts and tiny waists and the guys all had long white crazy-a**ed wigs and lots of make-up…
HAHA! I just had a movie-like scene play in my head where some guys decide to rob a bank or convenience store or somethin’ but one of them forgot his disguise so one of his buddies removes his MANTYhose & cuts it so his buddy can wear it over his head…
It is a sexual thing-
You folks have it all wrong! Doctors have been prescribing support hose for men and women for years, but those things are miserable. Mantyhose, support hose would help your legs feel terrific! Not to mention help older folks with blood clots, support hose help with that. Pantyhose DO keep your legs warmer, and they do make your legs look great. They keep your socks from showing, or worse, slipping down your ankle, and they give your butt a nice smooth look.
But for you women who don’t remember what life was like without pantyhose….let me refresh you….there was a time in America when girls were NOT allowed to wear jeans or slacks to high school, and so they were doomed to either socks, or hosiery, with garters. Ever worn a garter belt all day? Or a girdle with garters? Now that will make you chafe, not to mention rip them off when you first get home. Ever tried to keep the damn things up?
When pantyhose were invented back in the early 70’s, it was a liberation second only to the birth-control pill!! Now you could look nice and still be much more comfortable than with a girdle or a garterbelt. Even though fit has always been a little difficult to get just right, they’re still MUCH better than the alternative.
Oh, pantyhose aren’t perfect, but they’re damn sure better than old fashioned hosiery.
Garter belt anyone??