When I was a teenager, I remember a nurse telling me that older women sometimes forgot to lift up their breasts to wash underneath them. The mental image of this scarred me forever. And now all I can think is how does she clean under those things? Aaack.

My doctor told me that the first thing I said when I came to after the surgery was, “This is the first time since I hit puberty that my back doesn’t hurt!”

I feel sad for her, because insurance could take care of that little…er…huge problem.