I am doing FINE. Stop ASKING.


Do you guys have “this guy” at your places of employment? The “how you doin’?” guy? Well, for some reason this morning, it is extra annoying to me, so I thought I would post a video that gives you a glimpse into the morning ritual in our little corner of the world. At LEAST 15 times a morning, he yells to people passing down the hall…”HOW YOU DOIN’?”

I swear I might snap soon. First of all, 1997 called, and wants their sitcom quote back. Secondly, how is this even remotely a good greeting to someone? In the show version…as seen above…the joke was obvious. In a real life setting, what is the appropriate response to said question? “Fine.”? “Hi.”? A punch in face?

I am just hoping that this guy will soon move on to a more up-to-date reference. Anybody got a DVD set of “Everybody Loves Raymond” I could borrow?

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9 Responses to “I am doing FINE. Stop ASKING.”


  1. 1 Buckeye Bob

    OK, New greeting
    WTF’s going on?

    It’s better than an even older one I remember “How’s it hanging”
    That one always seemed a little personal.

  2. 2 mlm

    It seems like it’s only a LITTLE better than if he were to scream, “WHAAASSSUUUPPP!” like that Bud Light(?) commercial from a few years back.

  3. 3 wordwych

    Maybe you should answer him with the details about *every* single twinge, ache, throb or complaint you’ve had in the past week. I can see it now…

    THAT Guy: How YOU doin’?

    Dame: Well, I’m *finally* over the PMS, but now I’m cramping so hard I just want to kill every man I see simply because he doesn’t have to go through this crap. Plus, I’m craving chocolate like crazy, which completely screws up my diet. Do these pants make my butt look big? Look - no, LOOK. Do they make my butt look big? Got ‘em on sale, you know. Yesterday, I spent so much time in front of the computer that my eyes felt like they were going to burn right out of my head, and my left butt cheek kept going to sleep. Don’t you hate that? And don’t you hate it when you stump your toe? I did that this morning. I don’t know if it’s broken or not but it’s really starting to hurt–

    THAT Guy (looking desperately for someone, anyone coming down the hall: Um…er…

    Dame: — and I think I might have to go to the doctor. They really can’t set toes, you know. They just sort of tape the hurt toe to the next one and tell you to keep your foot elevated. My left ear has been itching like mad–

    THAT Guy (spotting someone else coming down hall): How YOU doin’?

    Dame: Hello? Excuse me? We were talking. I thought you cared. Why else would you ask me *every* morning how I’m doing? OMG, did I tell you about the horrible hairball my cat barfed up last night. I swear, it had a pulse and it was THIS BIG. I was almost scared of it–

    THAT Guy flees down the hall and spends the rest of the day hiding in the men’s room.

  4. 4 Pris

    If Wordwych’s idea doesn’t do the trick, nothing else (other than shooting the guy) will

  5. 5 Anonymous

    (great one Wordwych!)

    Now I’m picturing the barfed-up hairball….

  6. 6 cobrien

    Wordwych nailed it!! Dame if it makes you feel any better, my office has the same type of annoying man. We all duck behind our cubicle walls when we see him walk in..if he only knew how much he is reviled!!

  7. 7 Lori

    For some reason I kept making the same mistake of saying, “Hey, what’s up?!” when I pass this guy in our building.. He always answers “Mmmmm…I can’t tell you what’s REALLY up”. Gross. It must be small since I obviously CAN’T TELL!!

  8. 8 wordwych

    Oh Lori, if I’d been you, I would have said that right to his face! I used to work in a public library in what was then a very unpleasant part of town, and we’d get all manner of pervs who thought they were so very smooth with the sexual innuendo. I learned quickly to make references to things like “your little, little friend” and “your pet earthworm” and so on, and they learned to leave off the innuendo when I was on duty.

  9. 9 Diana

    Bravo, wordwych! I’m tempted to do that at work sometime.

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