When you stay up waaay too late, and you have to wake up waaaay too early, so that you actually fall asleep momentarily in your closet, STANDING UP, trying to choose something to wear, and you end up throwing a shabby outfit together and then you run around getting your kids ready to start the day, and in a mad last minute rush to get everyone out the door, you throw on a pair of shoes that you haven’t worn in a really long time but they match the shabby outfit really well, and in your haste and the hustlebustle of the morning it’s not until you actually reach your place of employment that your realize, to your horror, that the REASON you haven’t worn those shoes in a long time is because they make a completely humiliating QUACKING SOUND every time you take a step.
Welcome to my day.
Eeew! Sorry about your crappy day, Mock. I’ve never fallen asleep in the closet but I have dozed off in the shower. Worst of all is when you’re getting ready and handling the various morning oddities and you’re so proud of yourself for being all efficient and together and then you notice this weird beeping noise that keeps getting louder and louder until you realize that it’s the alarm clock and your butt is STILL IN BED forty minutes after you were supposed to be up!
You know what I hate? When you drink an entire bottle of wine for dinner to ensure that you don’t spend another night tossing and turning only to wake up 4 hours later and not fall back to sleep until 20 minutes before the alarm goes off. And to make matters worse, during those brief 20 minutes, you dream about dead kittens and two dragonflies flying through the air screwing – only the dragonflies are dead and totally dried up and they fly over the flame of a candle and burst into flames.
Welcome to my day. Oh, well. At least my shoes don’t squeak.
If it makes you feel any better…apparently, because my uterus has never been occupied by a human being, God is punishing me at 37 by giving me cramps that would kill a hippopotamus. I write a lot at my job, so I’m looking forward to tomorrow to see what I actually wrote today in my drug-induced stupor.
Or how about when you try on different shoes to see which one goes better with your outfit, get distracted, and realize halfway through the workday that you’ve been walking around in a mismatched pair all morning?! And home is an hour away. And you have no choice but to continue the entire rest of the day pointing it out to everyone just so they don’t think you didn’t notice.
I’m glad I work at home…in my pajamas, surrounded by 11 cats.
PS. Daisy, sorry about your uto, I just had mine removed as it had grown ginormous (quoting my GYN).
Happy days, happy days.
I am sorry about your poopy day. At least the quacking shoes is sort of funny, right?
That’s exactly why I changed my wardrobe so I no longer mix and match black and navy when I’m brain dead in the morning. I no longer purchase anything navy – because I’m tired of discovering while on the bus that I’m wearing navy tights with a black skirt
Daisy,
Sounds like fibroids. Get thee to a gyno quick, and insist on ultrasound — both kinds. If it’s fibroids, buy progesterone cream (from Whole Foods — they insist that brands test their products). It’s done wonders for me.
I agree with Hatchetwoman Daisy, I had ridiculous cramps for years until I got so sick, went to the doc and had to have a 7 lb cluster of fibroids removed along with everything else. Doc said it had been growing since my last baby 10 yrs ago, disgusting, but now I feel great (plus I lost like 12 lbs, lol) You may not be as bad as I was, hope not, but I would see a doc right away….good advice from Hatchetwoman..