You Know What I Hate?

I hate it when people make a big giant production out of the fact that they’re retiring, and therefore all sorts of accolades and extra press gets put out about them and all of the various contributions they’ve made to whatever activity they happened to be involved in, and then they turn around and decide that they don’t want to be retired after all, and then the press goes all crazy about how they’re coming out of retirement.  I hate this.  I hate it when singers do it, and I hated it when Michael Jordan did it, and when Brett Favre did it, and I am going on the record now as saying that I hate that Lance Armstrong is doing it.

You know what?  MAKE A DECISION AND STICK WITH IT.  I couldn’t care less if Lance can or does win another Tour de France.  HE IS SUPPOSED TO BE RETIRED.  We already know he can win it a whole bunch of times.  Just be retired already.

HATE.

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24 Responses to “You Know What I Hate?”


  1. 1 Ka-Duh

    HATE from me too!! I was in LOVE with Michael Jordan and basketball before he retired the first time… I was DEVASTATED when he retired. And then I was totally pissed when he came out of retirement after causing me all that emotional trauma just to come out of retirement. And then the Favre crap… I wanted to kick him in the head.

    There was a hilarious “article” on theOnion.com ripping on him awhile back http://www.theonion.com/content/news_briefs/favre_ive_always_had_a
    and another one posted recently ripping on him some more http://www.theonion.com/content/news/brett_favre_getting_that

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  2. 2 Jenn

    He wants to win it for the eleventieth time?

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  3. 3 Just Me

    I remember when Naomi Judd said she was retiring because of a liver ailment, but then she came back just a couple of years later. It got her a lot of attention and sympathy. It seems like these people need to have attention 24/7/365 and that they will do whatever it takes to get it. Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad that she’s OK, but like you said, make a decision and stick with it. And take your daughters with you.

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  4. 4 JC

    You know what I hate more than Lance Armstrong? All of the Lance Armstrong wannabes that I have to dodge in Austin traffic. Screw you all and your “Please be kind to cyclists” bumper stickers. HATE.

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  5. 5 sbarros

    Yeah, well, Brett proved this weekend that he still has it. And I say, if you can play the game…go ahead.

    On another note, sometimes when people retire (besides athletes and celebs), they find that retirement is boring and they feel the need to get back out and do something. Why should we hate them for that?

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  6. 6 Mockarena

    Whether or not he “has it” is not the point. The point is he RETIRED. I don’t care if he’s bored. It’s not like he made the decision NOT REALIZING that he wouldn’t actually be playing football. He knew he wouldn’t be playing, so to say, “You know what? I didn’t realize I would be so bored” is lame after putting the public through all of that waffling and then hoopla about actually retiring.

    Lance will probably win. It still doesn’t make it ok that he’s coming out of retirement. If you want to still do something, DON’T FREAKING RETIRE.

    Attention-whores. All of them. HATE.

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  7. 7 Russian Bastard

    Agreed Mockarena, agreed……whores

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  8. 8 wordwych

    I’m sick of the “I’m retiring…NOT!” crowd, too. (Especially Naomi Judd. I can’t stand her as much as Mockarena can’t stand Ashely.) It is almost a bit sad, though, that these people can’t seem to find anything fulfilling to do in their retirement. Either they’re total attention-whores (which is the most likely excuse) or they’re one-trick ponies.

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  9. 9 Hatchetwoman

    I wonder how many of these people HAVE to come out of retirement because they’ve spent all their money. I bet that’s the case for a good portion of them. They may pretend otherwise but I think it’s more common than we think.

    Let’s face it, despite the fact that so many celebrities like to spout off about politics and other subjects as if they had some secret, inside knowledge, the fact remains that a lot of these people don’t really know anything about running their business. They may have talent, but that doesn’t make them smart or financially savvy.

    Lance Armstrong is probably enslaved by his tremendous ego or by a tremendous debt.

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  10. 10 Buckeye Bob

    It’s easy for him to say it but let’s see if he’s got the balls to go through with it.

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  11. 11 SnarkyBritches

    Oh SNAP, Bob! Good one!

    I say, if you’ve retired and find *suddenly* that you’re bored – VOLUNTEER or TEACH what you did.

    Ego-mongers.

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  12. 12 Just Me

    Eeeekkkkk, I just realized that the last line in my reply from this afternoon, didn’t make much sense. I was talking about Naomi Judd staying retired and taking her daughters with her. When I read it again, it kind of sounded like I was talking to Mock. So sorry for the mix-up. Did that make any sense? lol

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  13. 13 amanda

    He’s bored. Since he has all of those millions from endorsements just laying around and he can’t find anything to do. Right.

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  14. 14 amanda

    One more thing, he can always date another celebrity whore to occupy his time. HATE. HATE. HATE.

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  15. 15 mikey

    I’m still laughing at the post (I can’t remember who the author was) who said that Lance had already “dipped his noodle into too many dishes”

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  16. 16 Punky

    Oh, Bob, your comment was the best! I think it’s a money and endorsement issue, too. I say, if you’re going to retire, do it. If you’re bored, use some of the money you’ve earned, and make new practice fields for kids in the city, whatever floats your boat. Coach even. There’s nothing wrong with doing what you love, but if you retire, you should let some up-and-comers have a chance in the spotlight.

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  17. 17 Wiggity

    The main reason Lance said he was retiring was to spend more time with his children. I don’t think he’s even been living in the same country as his children since he retired. He’s spent more time with his celebutard girlfriends than his kids. He even spent Father’s Day with Kate Hudson and her son. Way to go Lance! (not that I’m being judgemental or anything :)

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  18. 18 Benoît Côté

    So let me get this straight: any and all of you guys are allowed to hate someone you used to love (IOW to have changes of heart, or of mind, whatever) while your erstwhile heroes AREN’T allowed to do THE SAME about THEIR careers?

    Cyclist hater: learn to drive *more cleverly*, then you’ll be able to cope not only at home, but also if you ever visit Ottawa (Ont., Canada) where cyclists are many.

    The thing is that we’re all supposed to know how to cope with pedestrians, cyclists, motorcyclists, cars, and trucks medium and huge, whatever we drive or ride. It’s simply a matter of competence. Whining only helps maintain your anger, as though is was the cyclist’s fault, when after all it’s your reponsibility to cope with driving.

    (I cycle and drive a car. Year round. And we get snow and ice.)

    Ciao all, B.

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  19. 19 Mockarena

    I’m sorry, Benoit. I couldn’t read past the word “erstwhile.” I don’t think I’ve ever come across anyone who uses that word for REAL. Except maybe Ashley Judd.

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  20. 20 Benoît Côté

    Gee, thanks for the Judd comment. I feel “lucky” not to have been deleted.

    It means “previous”. A real toughy, given the context. B.

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  21. 21 Mockarena

    I know what it MEANS. I just can’t believe anyone USES it.

    No need to feel “lucky” not to have been deleted. You can feel lucky without needless quotation marks. :)

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  22. 22 Benoît Côté

    Um, glad you know and simply don’t use.

    Two, the quotation marks were intentional and remain appropriate.

    Hey, small peace cadeau: are you aware of the Sam Roberts band? See if you can find *Fixed to Ruin*. He’s sort of a handsome rocker out of Montreal. A little shabby but charming.

    Ciao, B. (Oh, Merry Christmas too.)

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