Either that, or she just prefers flour-white knees and feet. I suppose that’s possible.
Did I ever tell you guys about my first experience with the Mystic Tan spray-on booth thingy? Yes. I have done this. A friend of mine tried to prep me on what to expect, and told me that really there were just a few key things to note:
1. Make sure to put goo on your palms and elbows and knees so that the spray stuff doesn’t overdo those areas.
2. Make sure to wear the shower cap but leave your ears uncovered.
3. Get sprayed on your front first, then turn around, and get sprayed on your back. Each side takes about 10 seconds.
4. Hold your breath.
So, armed with that information, I went for my first cancer-free tanning experience. I put on the goo, put on the shower cap, walked into the booth, and held my breath.
Here is the key information my friend left out.
The spray is freaking COLD. It’s like an ice-monster from the North Pole is blowing snow on you. That’s what it feels like. And to make matters worse, it blasts at you suddenly, with no real warning, and so you know what happens as a result?
You gasp. Specifically, you inhale sharply from the shock of the misty spray-ice. Which is, as you might have already guessed, the EXACT OPPOSITE of holding your breath. By the time my frontular area was done, I was choking and sputtering and coughing and absolutely certain I was going to die from inhaling the icy poison.
I did manage to turn around and get sprayed on my backular area, still coughing, still gasping, still inhaling all the misty icy poison.
Inexplicably, after I escaped that cold chamber of death, I looked pretty good. I looked a heck of a lot more even than Lindsay does.
Plus, my lungs got REALLY TAN. Nothing more attractive than a pair of bronzed lungs.
MAYBE that’s a real tan and she was wearing socks. Maybe she was mowing the lawn. Yeah, I don’t buy that either. She did it all wrong and her feet look like she has frost bite.
Oh Mockarena, you sweet naif…celebrities do not spray tan themselves. They hire minions to do so for them. Looks like she pissed off the wrong aesthetician, though.
Completely agree about Mystic Tan. I went a few times but decided I was more likely to die from Mystic Tan related lung disease than skin cancer. Also, it made me look like I had eaten too many carrots.
As a redhead, I’m going to have debunk that “real tan” myth. Sorry.
Any temptation I may have ever had in regards to getting a spray-on tan has now been totally destroyed, Mock.
As for Lindsey, maybe her feet are white because there’s no blood getting to them? She looks like she’s wedged into those CFM heels pretty tightly. Love the bra strap showing. Really, that just makes a one-shouldered outfit look sooo classy. Maybe she saw the snarky comments about her last “I’m gonna go bra-less with my sheer top” photo and decided to keep her nips under wraps.
Socks and kneepads. Her tanning issues stem from wearing socks and kneepads at very inappropriate times.
Her left hand must have been involved too, because it’s as white as her ankles.
My mistake, Jenn. She must have been pulling a Michael Jackson and done the one-handed glove thing.