I hate the new rule that the BMV has about not smiling in your driver’s license picture anymore. Apparently, it has something to do with their new nifty facial recognition technology, and the inability of that new nifty technology to figure out teeth. So you can only do one of those dumb closed-mouth smiles. This works well for Mr. Mock, who, despite my constant complaints about it, always smiles without showing his teeth for photos. I, on the other hand, am the quintessential sorority-photo smile queen. It’s not just that I smile with my teeth, it’s that I smile with ALL OF THEM. You can see every last tooth in every picture I ever take ever. And I wasn’t even IN a sorority!!!
Plus, I am genetically programmed to smile if there is a camera pointed in my direction. It’s not even something I can control – it just happens.
Mr. Mock warned me about this new rule several weeks ago when he got his license renewed. So, knowing I had to get mine renewed today, I have been practicing looking in the mirror at myself with a closed-mouth smile. And I look ridiculous when I do that. So I kind of went into the whole license-renewing experience knowing that it would have a bad outcome. But I had no idea HOW bad the resulting photo would be. Holy crap, mockdockers – it’s HORRIFIC. The photo-taking lady was so sunny and cheerful and friendly that I practically had to dig my nails into my own hands to stop myself from smiling back. And seriously – how often does that happen at the BMV????
Anyway, I look like a deranged psychotic serial killer strung out on meth. Only sleepier.
WORST. PHOTO. EVER.
And no, I’m not posting it so don’t even ask. 
You know you must show the picture. Only a democrat would tell a story and refuse to reveal evidence to substantiate it.
Thank goodness my area of Ohio doesn’t have this yet. I just renewed my license this month. Mock, PLEASE show the pic!
they should take one for file with no smile, but let you smile in the one you have to carry around in your wallet.
Somehow I ended up with a really good (people wil do a double take and then say “wow! That’s a great picture of you) picture the last time I renewed. I know it will never ever ever be replicated. I dread renewing it.
Mock – we could all show our pictures – you know none of them will be good…..I had mine done in March and it is horrific…I smiled but the delay was just long enough for me to get annoyed, and show it…flash! the picture I have to live with for four years…..I will show mine if you show yours….
BOB- that made me laugh out loud and i woke my dog up!
im one step ahead…i already look like an escaped convict in mine.
i smiled 4 times for this lady and each time, she said…waiiit..woop…ohno…do it agaaaainn.. till the point where i gave her that “YOU HAVE GOT BE EFFING KIDDING ME” look and then SNAP! thats the one i ended up with. ughhh.
i have to get it renewed this month and its my goal to look at mean and nasty as possible and then whenever anyone checks my ID im going to smile like a MAD MAN at them. with my biggest, cheesiest, happiest smile. see what i did there? suckit DMV.
Isn’t it interesting that Mock refused to show photos from her life in GLEEEE-CLUB and now she refuses to share a perfectly simple drivers license photo that she herself mocked!!! I think the loyal mockers deserve a peek at the photo … I am sure we wil all promise NOT to comment or laugh.
I agree with Buckeye Bob … you must be leaning toward the Obama camp these days … mocking everything and controlling all media … hey wait this is YOUR site so maybe you are just like the GOVERNMENT … can we just call you big sister from now on?
Share the photo …. please.
Ashley_Judd – No!
Perhaps I haven’t mentioned this on The Mock Dock, but I am totally vain. You have no idea how hard it was for me to post that picture with Newt Gingrich – that was a TERRIBLE photo of me, but I did it because it was freaking NEWT.
But a rabid-looking driver’s license photo? Forget it. It’s too awful. I can’t bear the inevitable criticism and ensuing mockery.
I like to mock. I don’t like to BE mocked. And I’m not ashamed to admit it.
Crap. Tomorrow, I have to go to the DMV for a new license photo. Am now dreading it more than ever. The old picture was not good but better the Devil you know…
Mine is worse. In Ontario, Canada, the Department of Transport (as it’s called) decided, in its rehash of our driver’s licence security features, to go with a black-and-white pic-a-ture. Too much white under the eyes, no smile, also look the killer. Or sadist serial killer. Tasty.
Well, I had to get it renewed, and the latest iteration has my royal face bigger than before, and my signature reduced to something I certainly couldn’t produce.
(However, my face and signature are also reproduced, quite a bit smaller, as part of the peek-a-boo laser security protection around the number of the licence. THAT is cute. A mini-me.)
Well, let me just tell ya-My biggest problem when I have to renew my license is the electronic signature. It’s one of those pens that is wired to the thing, and it is not long enough for me to sign left handed. So it looks like crap. Also, my drivers license pic is what brought me to the realization that I have a big forehead.
Just came from the DMV and it was worse than I imagined. I was thinking about this post before getting my pic taken. We are still allowed to smile, so I decided to take full advantage and now look like a manic elf. mr rosie, who thinks I’m cute even when I look hideous, was snorting trying to hold back his laughter. Thanks Mockarena.
lol i just got my card renewed and i looked horrific my hair was completely messy and it was just horrible i always take bad pictures
I totally feel you on the smile-at-cameras thing. I used to be my high school mascot, and I smiled for every picture, even though you couldn’t see me at all in the wildcat head.