If my sister is looking at this picture, I promise you it is taking every ounce of her self-control not to hurl her laptop across the room right now. Such is the hatred she has for Renee McLemonsucker. And here, not only do we have the standard Renee squinty-eyed lemon-lips pose, but we also have her pointy shoulders.
Those gross me out.
I do not understand men (that means YOU, Bradley Cooper) who are attracted to women that look like sinewy stringbeans. I mean, seriously, does Renee look fun to hug? No. It’d be like hugging a few branches of a weeping willow tree.
This is the kind of awesomeness that you’re missing if you aren’t watching Glee. And the scene with the gay dude and his dad at the end of the show last night? OMG – it was so sweet.
And the dude with the reverse mohawky thing? SO HOT.
You guys know I’m like the suckiest photoshopper ever, but the fact that I even HAD TO TRY on this photo is the whole reason it’s on The Mock Dock to begin with. Sucky photoshopping skills aside, LOOK AT HOW LOW AND FLAT HER BOOBS ARE.
And I have to tell you, I’m totally disappointed. Back when an alert and astute mockdocker sent me this video, I assumed, wrongly, that there was something battery-powered or mechanical about this thing. But you guys, this particular piece of exercise equiment requires a person to do all the work.
This is completely unacceptable. I thought I would be fighting against work that it was going to do on its own, which I could totally buy into. I can buy into defensive exercise. But with the shakeweight, you basically have to just stand there and shake it. I suppose if you did that for 6 minutes (which, by the way, is the most completely random suggested amount of time to spend on a particular piece of exercise equipment EVER), then your arms might get tired and you might feel some muscle strain in them. But it kiiind of seems like you could just as easily shake a a jar of peanut butter and get the same effect.
I haven’t yet tried the accompanying DVD – and perhaps that will make all the difference in the world. Who knows.
But you know what? I think I ought to invent the kind of shakeweight that shakes on its own, and then requires you to fight against it by trying to hold it steady while it shakes the crap out of itself. In fact, I think I will trademark my new invention as “The Defensive Exerciser” and market it against the shakeweight.
I’m telling you, I can win.
Meantime, I’ll try shaking this thing some more, and will let you know how it goes.
An alert and astute mockdocker sent me this video, and I am officially SCARRED FOR LIFE.
On a happier note, the SHAKEWEIGHT HAS ARRIVED. I haven’t taken it out of the box yet though, because I am lazy. But I’ll do that today and tell you about it soon. Promise. Meantime, let’s join together in being scarred from life from this video.
I mean, everything about this couple is hilarious, but dude’s pants are my favorite. And he kind of looks like a cartoon version of Michael Bolton, which makes me giggle.
So, Buckeye Bob sent me a video of a roller coaster ride, and the accompanying message said, “I like this rollercoaster.”
And since it was Buckeye Bob, I was expecting to see – oh, I don’t know – someone getting super sick right in the middle of it, or someone peeing themselves, or something of that nature.
And then I watched the video, and thought, “OF COURSE. Boobs.”
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