This is not a joke. This is an Actual Person who Actually Thinks his hair looks good.
My favorite part is when he “rubs the gel around the perimetah.” And then when he uses the moldah and shapah. FOR A SOLID FIFTEEN SECONDS.
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I’m hoping that an unusual dust storm strikes the Jersey shore.
What a useless pretty boy. I just about gagged when I saw his hair, and then I really did gag when I saw the pseudo-rosary around his neck. Maybe someone needs to tell him about the sin of vanity.
I really, really hope all his hair falls out. Or that someone pours a bucket of water over him. Or lights a match and tosses in his hair. OK, maybe not that last one, but couldn’t someone attack him with hair clippers?
Hatchetwoman – ever see Jackass where they had the hair clipper camera? They’d sneak up on each other and buzz their hair, ending up with a bald streak! Please Johnny Knoxville, find this guy and buzz his hair! What is with the stupid accent? They’re not from New York. What a douche. I don’t even know any women who do all that stuff to their hair, or take that much time. Dear God, please strike him with male pattern baldness, Amen.
And he shaves his armpits.
I can’t even imagine how that feels when it dries. It looks so stiff and sticky. It’s like Jersey is it’s own bizarre culture. Maybe they’ll secede from the union.
And he does the eyebrows too. Am I the only one who finds it creepy when guys get their eyebrows waxed? Of course I don’t want my husband to have a unibrow, but other than that, I think I’d be creeped out. Just think, he’s voting age.
Those Joisey people never fail to amuse…
“Poifect ev’ry time.” Bet his kids and grandkids get a laugh outta that some day. Assuming any Douch-ette takes an interest in him.
Imagine running your fingers through that mess!
Poifect evytime, fugetabouut it!