The Mock Dock

I know that I have a whole other site on which I get to be political, but you guys, I just have to share with you the video of my teeny tiny conversation with Michael Steele, the RNC Chairman.  And it’s really not political or divisive at all (unlike, apparently, an earlier segment which you can also read about at my other site).  It’s just me, calling Michael Steele a cool cat, and asking him a question.  And I’m kinda proud of it (even though I’m really giggly in it and you can kind of see that wattle I told you about before)  and since I use this blog as a place to share some of the more exciting and personal moments of my life, I wanted to show it to you guys here too.

I mean, seriously.  If you’d have told me, about five months ago when I started the other site with Daisy, if I thought we’d be chatting it up with folks like Michael Steele and Ari Fleischer and Mitch Daniels, I would have laughed at you.  I would have pointed at you and laughed and mocked you for suggesting something so ridiculous.  So even if you violently disagree with me about politics, you have to at least have a little understanding about my complete and utter amazement that all of this is happening to us, and my desire to talk ad nauseum about it. 

I promise not to do it often, but I couldn’t resist it this time.  I mean, it’s ME.  Talking to MICHAEL STEELE.  Directly.

Doesn’t that make you just look at the screen in disbelief and think, “Whaaa?”

Yup.  Me too.

You guys – do you remember last fall when Daisy and I were attacked by the suicidal chicken? And how I told you that this is the kind of crap that happens when she and I are together?  Well, it’s been another suicidal chicken sort of day. 

But first, allow me to just tell you how WELL RESTED I am.  As you know, Grandma Mock took Junior Mock last night, and is keeping him this whole week so that I can catch up on sleep.  So last night, I slept a solid 8 hours.  STRAIGHT.  And then I woke up even 10 times more cheerful than I normally am.  For those of you who know me, you know I am relentlessly cheerful in the mornings anyway, so you can only imagine the total GLEE that I was feeling today.  I even spontaneously hugged my CFO – which prompted him to say, “What the hell is the matter with you?” to which I responded, “I’m just so RESTED! I’m feeling extra cheerful today!”  And so he just shook his head and muttered, “Greeeat” because he already thinks I’m an abnormally happy person, and was afraid about how MORE happiness might wreak havoc around the office.

Anyway, Daisy and I had lunch with some Important People today – people that have the power and connections to help Chicks On The Right gain readership and exposure, which is a really cool thing.  So we chose a little restaurant mid-town which offered outside seating, since it was pretty nice out at lunchtime.  And so we’re lunching and chatting and exchanging ideas with the Important People, and Daisy starts telling a story, and all of a sudden, the largest insect EVER dive bombs directly into her eye.  And you should have seen how cool she was about it.  She was all calm and nonchalant about it, as if bugs the size of chihuahuas fly into her eyes on a routine basis.  She just sort of brushed it away, and went about her story-telling.

You guys, if this would have happened to me, this is how it would have played out:  First, I would have shrieked loud enough to break every window within a 1 mile radius of the restaurant.  Next, I would have immediately jumped up and started flapping my arms around like a madwoman, in order to get rid of the insect which would have been long gone by then.  And in the process of jumping up, I would have managed to knock the entire table over, putting everyone’s lunches directly into their laps.  This is how I would have managed the flying chihuahua.   Daisy?  Totally cool.  Which is lucky for us, seeing as how we were with Important People and all.

Someday, you guys, Daisy and I are going to be famous (only not the gross Paris Hilton kind of famous), and you can tell everyone that you knew us back in the day when we were attacked by flying chihuahuas and suicidal chickens.

An alert and astute mockdocker sent me a photo from GQ of Paul Rudd covered in puppies.  Daisy and I are going shopping tonight.  The weather is fantastically gorgeous.  I am having a decent hair day.  I have leftover Easter chocolate.  Liberals are descending upon www.chicksontheright.com and keeping the debates lively.  Mini-Mock was thrilled with the flag I brought home for him from the Indy Tea Party and said the Pledge of Allegiance perfectly and without prompting this morning.

Life is good, mockdockers.  Life is good.

I have an important announcement to share with all of you!

You may have noticed, like I have, that whenever I post something related to politics, that people FLIP THE FREAK OUT in the comments.  And I mean that in a good way.  It’s obvious that you have strong political feelings, and you know I do as well.  But after reviewing the results of the recent mockdock surveys, and taking into account the reasons you all visit The Mock Dock in the first place, I’ve decided that perhaps this isn’t the best place for those politically-driven posts.

So guess what!  I, along with alert and astute mockdocker Daisy, am excited to announce the launch of a new website we’ve started together. This website will be my outlet for ranting about the state of the union, and so those of you who enjoy my rants can come visit, and those of you who hate my rants can just stay here.  And those of you who hate my rants but want to post comments about them anyway because you like to fight with me are also welcome to visit the new site.

LET ME BE VERY CLEAR.  The Mock Dock isn’t going anywhere.  It’s going to keep on chugging along and I’m going to continue to mock all the same stuff you’re accustomed to me mocking.  And you never know, I might not be able to contain myself and I may throw a political post on here now and then just to watch everyone FLIP THE FREAK OUT again.  But our new website will be specifically devoted to politics – the lighter, mockier side of politics, but politics nonetheless. 

You know what I’ve learned from posting political stuff here? It’s just not “hip” to be a conservative anymore. So, of course the liberals elected themselves a rock-star. The alternative was the stereotypical stodgy-old white guy. Daisy and I believe that the conservative movement needs to break through that stereotype, jump into this century, and get its collective butt in gear from a technological and public relations standpoint.  Starting our new website is the only way we know how to help compete with the media’s deification of our new rockstar President.  We conservatives AREN’T all country-music-blaring, heat-packing, bible-thumping, rich WASPs with trust funds. And we think there are others out there like us – stiletto and Sephora-wearing chicks (and guys who love them) who believe in a healthy respect for government while understanding that it’s the people who are the only ones who should be responsible for giving strength to our government.

So here’s the thing. We have decided to do our part to help re-brand the conservative party by launching our new site which will freely poke fun at the political process and all of its related people and parts. Because you know me – no matter what, I’m all about the mockery. 

Mockdockers – whether you’re a liberal or conservative or anything in between, you are welcome to visit:

 http://chicksontheright.com!!!

I now return you to your regularly scheduled mocking.