So this is what Christie Brinkley’s husband used to look like back in the day. Let’s just say that David Beckham could certainly teach him a thing or two about how to fill out some speedos. Anyway, you’re not going to believe this, since Peter Cook is a cheating pervert, but he found himself a new girlfriend.
Suzanne Shaw, pictured below, KNOWS all the creepy stuff he did, and is his girlfriend anyway. Sometimes I’m just amazed at how stupid women can be. How can she not know that the exact same thing is going to happen to her? HOW?
David Beckham is full on grabbing himself, and the entire spectating audience appears to be concerned with basically everything else in the universe EXCEPT David Beckham and anything remotely related to soccer.
In fact, blond girl with the full beer is simulating shooting herself in the mouth. She is THAT bored.
If you are ADDING ON to one of many palacial mansions that you own because you need a separate room specifically for swordfighting, you are stupid-rich.
Crazy Tom Cruise reportedly has built such a room and gets together with his buddies Will Smith and David Beckham for fancy fencing parties.
I am not making this up.
You know, I would be happy to have new countertops in my kitchen. That’s all I ask. Meanwhile, Crazy Tom Cruise is building rooms in which he can pretend to be Zorro.
Life is so not fair.
LOOK at how ferociously mean Victoria Beckham looks in this photo. I mean, normally, she just looks kinda pissed off in photos, but not viciously hatefully mean. She looks like someone just asked her to eat a piece of cake.
Because they have come out with the Beckham Easter Egg Collection. And yes, they are actually edible.
I would totally snark on this more if it wasn’t for charity, but it turns out it IS for charity, and for kids no less. And even though I know I’m already going to hell, I would at least like a good seat down there. So sorry - no snarking on the Beckham Eggs. Or Beggs, as I affectionately like to refer to them.
As if he wasn’t already practically perfect, David Beckham took time out of his busy schedule to visit some cancer-stricken kids in a chinese hospital the other day.
The reason he’s only practically perfect and not TOTALLY perfect is because he sounds like a pre-pubescent boy when he talks. Seriously - you look at his chiseled jawline and his athletic body and his really masculine looking face, and you think, “Wow - he really is pretty much perfect” and then he starts talking and all of a sudden you’re thinking, “Wait. How did Elmo from Sesame Street inhabit David Beckham’s body??”
It’s really distracting.
Seriously - how douche-ariffic is Dr. 90210? It’s sad really…because he’d be a decent looking fellow if he wasn’t such an UTTER AND COMPLETE TOOL. This is apparently how he appears when he’s out and about and not implanting boobs into 18 year old hollywood brats.
I just had, just now, a vision of myself yanking off whatever that crap is around his neck, and poking him in the eye with it. And it was like the best vision ever. Not quite as good as the one where David Beckham was kicking Celine Dion’s head around a soccer field, but close.
There is something about Celine Dion which makes me snicker anytime I see a photo of her. She’s just so utterly ridiculous. So imagine my delight at finding this. I had the weirdest thought process when I saw it. At first, I thought wow - there’s something about the way her skinny little chicken neck looks in this picture that makes it seem like if she took her hands away from her chin, her head would roll right onto the ground. And then I thought, if that happened, wouldn’t it be hilarious if it rolled right onto a soccer field, and then David Beckham started kicking it around? And then I thought that maybe Victoria Beckham would yell at him to stop kicking Celine’s head, so that she could get a chance to take that ridiculous African headdress off of it.
Anyway. That’s what I thought when I saw this picture. I’m sure you did too.
I’ve tried and tried to stop myself, but I can’t. I totally love this couple. Victoria is so absurd but she knows how absurd she is. She embraces her absurdity. And even though David sounds like a 12 year old boy whose voice hasn’t quite done the man-up thing yet, he gets a pass because, well, he looks like THAT. And I love that they genuinely seem normal in interviews, even though they could afford to buy several countries and are more recognizable than most world leaders.
There. I said it. I love the Beckhams. Sign me up for a 12-step program.
This is apparently some super fan of Nick Carter’s, who has created a cardboard/stuffed version of him to keep her company, as well as a baby version of him to play house with. Let’s discuss.I think it’s actually LESS weird that she’s gone to such lengths to show her devotion to someone than it is that she’s showing it to NICK CARTER. Robbie Williams - I could almost understand. David Beckham - perhaps. But Nick Carter? Really?
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