When famous parents take their kids to paparazzi-filled places. I mean, this is the first pic of Suri I’ve seen where I feel really bad for her for having such a stupid mom. If I were a famous scientology alien mom like Katie, and I cared for my daughter the tiniest bit, I would move to like, some small town in North Dakota or something, so my kid had at least a sliver of hope of having a normal childhood. Paparazzi are not known for chasing people in North Dakota. I don’t even think they’d follow Britney there.
Katie Holmes. The fact that Suri is walking around in public, at WELL OVER TWO YEARS OF AGE, holding a bottle and a blanky is ridiculous. Not to mention that her dress looks like a hospital gown. YES. I just mocked a two year old’s dress.
Anyway, Katie got her haircut a little more like Tom Cruise shorter. Which I would be less inclined to mock if she weren’t infuriatingly dead set on bringing pegged jeans back into fashion.
Coupla things going on here that need to stop.
First, at no time should one’s belly button protrude more than one’s nipular area. That is just not ok.
Second, at no time should a woman’s crotchular area protrude more than her nipular area. Katie may want to consider NOT wearing Tom Cruise’s jeans, in order to prevent this type of crotchular bunching. It looks like there could seriously be a penis in there.
Seriously - have you ever seen a couple look more annoyed and more LIKE EACH OTHER than Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes?
I kind of get the sense from this photo that maybe Katie has just sort of accepted her fate of looking like Tom. Like she’s resigned herself to her scientological existence. This is as dead in the eyes as you can look, I think.
How old is she now - like 43? Remember when she used to be kind of adorable? She’s all mommified now. Not that there is anything wrong with being a mom, but there is NO REASON to look mommified.
I do not appreciate Tom Cruise’s cowboy hat.
I’m not totally opposed to parents dressing their kids in clothes that match them on occasion. Like, for instance, when my husband and our toddler dress up in the same Lands End red plaid flannel shirt in the winter - ADORABLE. So adorable it makes my heart hurt. But when Katie Holmes wears sheer leggings and red shoes and what appears to be a tattered nascar checkered flag and puts her daughter WHO IS WAY TOO OLD FOR A BOTTLE in a matching jailhouse shirt and refuses to cut her bangs?
HATE.
I’m not exactly sure what differentiates your average everyday party from a GALA, but this is Katie Holmes and her midget husband Tom Cruise at a gala of some sort.
I think I’ve wrapped gifts in the same material Katie is wearing as a dress. That cannot be considered an actual fabric. And what sort of statement is she trying to make with those shoes? Is it simply a ploy to draw attention to the only part of her body that’s at an equal playing level as her husband’s?
Suri Cruise is TWO YEARS OLD. Why the heck is she still getting a bottle? Is this a Scientology thing? Is the fact that her mother is slowly morphing into Mary Tyler Moore a Scientology thing?
So many questions.
Rumor has it that the friendship between Victoria Beckham and Katie Holmes (looking like Victoria’s grandmother in this photo) is over, for reasons which include but aren’t limited to:
1. Scientology
2. The fact that Tom is worried about Katie trying to be as skinny as Victoria
3. Katie calling tattoos “tacky” knowing full well that Victoria has a few
4. Scientology
5. Scientology
You know what’s really retarded? Scientology. The only thing that being involved in Scientology says about you is that you are absurdly impressionable and incapable of independent thought. Victoria may be tattooed and skinny, but she doesn’t believe that she was created by Xenu or that her husband is the only one who can help out in a car accident.
Katie: 0
Victoria: 1
Suri Cruise just turned 2. And her Xenu-following freakparents spent ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS on her birthday party. This apparently included 17k worth of flowers, 45k in catering, and a five thousand dollar CAKE, among other things.
I’m sure while Tom and Katie were busying themselves with the Beckhams and Will Smith and Eva Longoria and all their other fancy friends, Suri was happily nibbling on a piece of grass and playing inside the box her cake came in. BECAUSE TWO YEAR OLDS DON’T CARE ABOUT THAT EXPENSIVE CRAP.
Yes. I’m bitter. They dropped more on a stupid CAKE than I can manage to put in a 529 plan for my kid’s college fund for crying out loud. Jerks.
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