Just ON her though. Not so much IN her. Just ON her.
Tag Archive for 'Lindsay Lohan'
Remember when I posted about Chief Bratton before? Well, I continue to love him, and he continues to say the best stuff ever. Today, he said that the whole paparazzi issue has calmed down substantially since “Britney started wearing clothes and behaving; Paris is out of town not bothering anybody anymore, thank God, and evidently, Lindsay Lohan has gone gay, we don’t seem to have much of an issue.” How great is that?
He was speaking about some dumb proposal that creates really dumb, completely unenforceable laws to crack down on the paparazzi, when in fact, it’s the celebrities themselves causing much of the commotion. He said further, “If the ones that attract the paparazzi behave in the first place, like we expect of anybody, that solves about 90 percent of the problem. The rest we can deal with.“
You can just tell how much he loves celebrities, can’t you? I mean, the love is just ooooozing out of him. I totally agree with him, except that it’s kind of a bummer for us at the Mock Dock when celebrities behave.
How much do you love that he totally called out Lindsay Lohan for “going gay”? SO great.
LOVE.
According to this, people are buying Lindsay Lohan’s $100 leggings. In droves. Like, there are lines to buy them.
What the hell?
If you are a leggings wearer for any purpose other than an 80’s throw-back costume party, whether they are Lohan Leggings or some other brand, I need to tell you that you look horrible in them. I may not know you, I may not have ever seen you, but I am 100% certain that you look like asscrap in your leggings. THEY DO NOT FLATTER ANYONE. You are wearing tights without feet. That’s it. It’s no fancier or more fashion-forward than that. TIGHTS SANS FEET.
Congratulations.
So I got home a few hours ago and settled myself in and being home is awesome. But I just got on line to check out what’s been happening in the world of celebrities, and discovered some very disappointing news.
First of all, can I just tell you how totally annoyed I am that leggings are back in style? These flatter NO ONE. Not a single solitary person. And if that wasn’t already bad enough, it seems that the only people that wear them are either stupid celebrities OR oversized women. Celebrities you almost have to forgive because they’re idiots most of the time. But oversized women - PLEASE. I beg you to stop. What you’re doing is practically criminal.
Anyway, back to the real reason I’m pissed.
Lindsay Lohan has lately let loose a line of leggings. And she has the audacity to charge $99 for the ones on the right, and ONE HUNDRED THIRTY TWO DOLLARS for the ones on the left. This PISSES ME OFF. Where does anyone get off charging that kind of money on a pair of tights with built in knee pads?
Anyone who actually forks over that kind of cash for leggings should be immediately forced to contribute an equal amount of money to charity. Jerks.
Behold: a sneak peek at the new reality show starring Lindsay Lohan’s little sister and her psycho mom, Dina. In this clip, we get to hear how Ali wants to be just like Lindsay. She even uses the word “ASPIRE”, which is only impressive to the extent that Lindsay probably doesn’t even know what that word means.
All in all, this is a trainwreck. Who wants to place bets on the date Ali enters rehab?
When people I can’t stand look really horrible in photos. I literally get the warm and fuzzies when something like this falls into my lap. Look at Lindsay’s stupid self-promoting sleazebag of a mom. And then look at how pissed off Lindsay is.
I LOVE this photo. LOVE.
Lindsay Lohan. I mean, look at her. And I know she’s pissed off in this photo and she’s not sucking her gut in, but in general even besides those things I just think she’s pretty ordinary. That’s not to say that huge amounts of make-up and stylists can’t make her look good, because they can. But as a regular person, she is just totally and utterly average to me.
Anyway, I just wanted you to know how I felt about her level of attractiveness, because I know you’ve all been losing sleep wondering what I thought about it.
So now you know.
I know I haven’t put up the totally NSFW pictures of Kristin Davis that have been leaked all over the place over the last two days. And it’s because I can’t help but like her a little, and I feel really bad for her, and the pictures are completely unflattering and if it was me in them I would be utterly mortified and I just can’t bring myself to mock them AT ALL.
However, the picture above is the douchebag that she dumped sixteen years ago, and now that the SATC movie is about to come out, he decided to pick now as the time he’d feel all pissed off at her for dumping him and sell the private photos of her he took.
His name is Eric Stapleman and he owns some restaurant in New Mexico. And he’s obviously a jerk.
Let this be a lesson to all women everywhere. DO NOT let your boyfriend/husband take naughty pictures of you unless you have sole access to them afterwords. This kind of crap always happens.
Now, if this happened to someone like Paris or Lindsay, then I would definitely mock it. Oh wait! It DID happen to them. HA HA!
This is their DAD.
Just let that soak in for a minute.
If your dad wore this type of get-up routinely, wouldn’t you sort of be destined to check into rehab at some point in your life?
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