Tag Archive for 'Mariah Carey'Page 2 of 3

Exhibit #46: Example of a Really Really Good Decision

According to the NY Daily News, Mariah Carey isn’t going to have kids.  Which I think we should all just take a moment to be thankful about.

<taking a moment to give silent thanks>

Anyway, the reason she doesn’t want to have them is because to do so would make her feel “violated”, and because “you have to try and stay pretty, you know.”

I hate her so much. 

Here Is A Fashion Fad I’m Not A Fan Of

Jorts, panty-hose and heels?  Really? 

Why?  Why would any self-respecting woman put on pantyhose with a pair of shorts?

Mariah Carey On American Idol

God I hate Mariah Carey. And you know what I especially hate? The way she points and flutters her hand around her own face when she sings, as if she’s conducting herself. And when she goes for the high notes, she points up, as if to say, “Observe commoners - as I reach high notes right in front of you.” I hate her SO MUCH. And you know what else I hate? The fact that Paula Abdul wore an entire bouquet of flowers around her neck last night. What was that about?

The Top 7 With Mariah Carey

I am pretty sure that this evening’s edition of American Idol was created specifically to see how much Mariah Carey I could withstand before taking my own life.  And I’m happy to report that I’m still here.  BUT BARELY.  Jump in to read about the show. Continue reading ‘The Top 7 With Mariah Carey’

Mariah Carey Enjoys Being Severely Airbrushed

mariah.jpg 

This is apparently a leaked photo from Pariah Carey’s new album.  And it is RIDICULOUS.  It is so outrageously over produced that it barely resembles her.  It instead resembles a cross between Lena Horne, Rita Rudner, and an ostrich

But that’s kinda mean to ostriches.

Hey - did you guys know I hate Mariah Carey?

I Love This Picture So Much

Mariah Carey

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There is something about this picture that makes Mariah Carey look like a muppet.  I don’t know if it’s her preposterous shoes, or her goofy muppet grin, or her little muppet slouch, but she is ridiculous.  And that makes me happy.

Someone Call The Humane Society

Mariah_dog

Seriously.  How miserable is it to be Mariah Carey’s dog? Look at the pitiful, despondent, hopeless, dejected look on that poor little guy’s face.  Have you seen a sadder dog? 

Hang in there, doggie.  God loves a terrier.

Mariah Carey is Completely In Love. With Herself.

gallery_main-0129_mariah_carey_jewelry_02.jpg

Pariah went jewelry shopping for some new necklaces.  I’m guessing this photo was snapped riiiiiight about when she was asked if her breasts were real.

I really really really hate her. 

You Can Hold My Umbrella, Ella, Ella, Eh, Eh, Eh

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Pariah Carey can’t even be bothered to hold her own umbrella these days.  Look at this poor sap.  How much self esteem do you think he has?  He has to go to sleep at night knowing that the most worthy accomplishment of his day is that he kept the sun off a jack russell terrier.  Consider that for a moment.

Hopefully Pariah carries man-treats for him, at least.

Behold: Pariah’s New Album Cover

Words can’t do justice to the level of hatred I have for her and her stupid album cover.