Katie Holmes is rocking a new hairstyle. Obviously this she found the style in the “Scientology-accepted Cult Hair Styles 2008″.
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Gawker.com is apparently really good at turning up all kinds of good stuff about the scam known as Scientology, and this video is no exception. Apparently the lead dude of Scientology, that David Miscavige guy, threw Tom Cruise a birthday party on the Official Scientology Cruiseship (?), and the resulting video shows Tom making an absolutely idiot out of himself, singing and dancing and inexplicably laughing at things that aren’t the least bit funny.
See for yourself. The guy is the very definition of insanity.
See that girl that Tom Cruise is having to essentially prop up as they exit a restaurant? That’s all that remains of the girl who used to be Katie Holmes. Look at how utterly helpless and just WRECKED she looks. And frankly, Tom looks as though he’s physically exhausted from having to control her mind all the time.
This is what happens when you become a Scientologist, kids. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.
Katie Holmes was just recently interviewed, and even though I should probably think it’s sweet and romantic that she’s completely head over heels in love with her husband and daughter, I do not. In fact, I think it’s creepy and I’m pretty much convincd that if you removed her face, there would be circuitry underneath developed by the overlords at Scientology headquarters which automatically spits out this sappy crap. Anyway, read this excerpt for yourself, and see if you don’t want to vomit.
WHAT’S YOUR IDEA OF HEAVEN?
Falling in love with Tom and our daughter. I’m such a lucky woman. Sometimes I feel like I’m dreaming.
WHAT WERE YOUR DREAMS AS A CHILD?
To marry Tom Cruise! (Laughs)
HOW DID YOU MEET TOM?
We just went on this great date together, and it’s been wonderful ever since. He’s the most amazing man in the world. I’m so happy. I love him. I feel like he’s made my life.
HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE HIM?
He’s just amazing. He’s kind, generous, smart, he’s Tom Cruise - he’s the most artistic man I’ve ever met. He makes me laugh like I’ve never laughed. He’s made me feel joy like I never have before. There are so many things. He’s the most wonderful human being I know.
WHO WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE STUCK IN AN ELEVATOR WITH?
Tom and Suri.
You know what, Katie? My husband is way better than your husband. So you can suck it.
There is something about Katie Holmes that reminds me of a cocker spaniel. The hair maybe? I’m not sure. In any case, isn’t it cute how in Scientology, you match your shoes and purse to your husband’s vest?
Between the red cape Stepford wife, the Scientology freak, Muscle-arms, Unibrow, and Crazy Liberal Lesbian, we’ve got ourselves a circus here.
First, let’s start with a little scientology spoof. LOVE the video above. So great.
But I saw today that a recruiting/marketing video from the Scientologist wackjobs was leaked on the web. And this isn’t just a Tom Cruise not-meant-to-be-seen-by-the-general-public video, it’s an honest to goodness, here’s-why-you-should-be-a-scientologist video. And I’m here to tell you - it’s creepier than Adnan Ghalib. Here’s an excerpt:
“Right this instant, you are at the threshold of your next trillion years. You will live it in shivering, agonized darkness, or you will live it triumphantly in the light. The choice is yours, not ours.
If you, this minute, say, “I will, for better or for worse, go on in Scientology,” you will open the door to your own future. If you say otherwise, you slam tomorrow shut in your own face. I’m sorry, but that’s the way it really is. We are here to help you on the trail that leads up. If you fall off, we’ll try to help put you back on. But it is up to you. It is how you use it that counts. For you are the one that counts.
If you leave this room after seeing this film, and walk out, and never mention Scientology again, you are perfectly free to do so. It would be stupid, but you could do it. You can also dive off a bridge and blow your brains out, that is your choice. But if you don’t walk out that way, if you continue with Scientology, we will be very happy with you, and you will be very happy with you. You will have proven you are a friend of yours.”
Seriously. This video is serious. It seriously says that if you don’t mention Scientology after seeing the video, you’re stupid, and it’s the equivalent of blowing your brains out. (I am exempt, of course, because here I am mentioning it to you).
Anyway, I saw another article that mentioned that the bigwigs at Scientology headquarters are all happy because the number of searches in google and other search engines is way up ever since the Tom Cruise video leak. They genuinely believe that people are looking it up out of interest, and seem to be painfully unaware that people are looking it up to MOCK THEM.
I am more than creeped out by this whole religion. Look at this Leah Remini email and tell me that this “religion” isn’t totally wack. Apparently, in order to move up the Scientology ranks, one of the requirements is that you have to memorize more and more acronyms.
I’d heard some internet chatter about this video of Tom Cruise talking about Scientology, and after forcing myself to see it, I am seriously, genuinely, honestly, sincerely, truly terrified of Tom Cruise. Dude is completely out of his mind and there is no way that Katie Holmes has not been brainwashed.
WTF? Were Tom and Katie involved in some sort of molar display contest or is this really they way they smile at each other? I’ve seen rabid dogs look less crazed than these two.
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